Perfectionist or just very organised

Am I a perfectionist or just want to be very organised?

One thing I know I can be such a perfectionist sometimes, like with drawing. I have made a drawing but never finished it. Even though others didn’t saw the flaw, I did and I know it is there. In this case, I can’t cover it up. Normally I try to cover it up by changing here and there.

But am I a perfectionist if I clear up my stuff before I go upstairs to my bed? I don’t think so. I just like the idea when I come downstairs in the morning that everything is cleared. That way I can find things easier and I don’t have to waste my time to clear up things. It uses to be very different few years ago. I even put my clothes away if I am not going to wear it the next day. Sometimes I even scare myself for being so organise these days. Really, I wasn’t like that at all!81c25ac0596eada8bd6e9297d4249e60

One thing I realise, if I want to go for it with my plans then I have to let go some of my perfectionism. I want do the right way, perfect. I set the standard already very high, but I am realistic enough not to have high expectations. It need time to grow and develop. I just want to do the right way. I rather want spend time on drawing instead all those things around it. But I have no choice and have to spend time on that as well. Then I feel overwhelmed by it. I write everything down in my notebook so my head won’t be that chaotic. I can work down the list. It is just… sometimes I just don’t know where to start. Then I feel Mr. Chaos coming back in my head again.

I did however ask few friends of mine to help me. It is a big step to ask for help because I rather do it all by myself. But I can’t and have to reach out. Also, let go Miss Perfectionist.

Suddenly I realise that I have difficulty with focussing on some aspect because I just don’t know what to write or how or where to start. Also. my insecurity gets in the way. That is why I hope with the self-help book I manage to get over it and move forward, believe in myself and that I can do it.

There is one aspect that still kind of hold me back and next month that aspect is gone. Then I know for sure I feel freer to go for it and spend all my time in realising what I want to do! I simply have to believe in myself and tell myself, I can do it!!

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7 thoughts on “Perfectionist or just very organised

  1. I love organizing and cleaning up. In the past, I’d end up tidying my desk if I can’t find something and feel good afterwards. The downside of that is I don’t finish what it was I needed to do. But then this cycle also made me realize it’s when I organize, arrange or clean things that my mind also declutters. It gives me a sense of therapy that I’m arranging the space in my head for some important things I need to do. I usually end up doing work I find satisfactory after I clean up, both mentally and physically.
    I think it’s good if it helps you in anyway or if it brings out something positive (like what you said you don’t want to waste time looking for something or cleaning up the next day) instead of being frustrated about. πŸ™‚ You are definitely organized and that’s a good thing.
    I hope all goes well with your self help book.
    Have a great week.

    Liked by 1 person

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